How many of you have felt lost before?
More of lost and less of alone actually, more of lost inside your own mind,
lost in your thoughts.

Have you ever just sat down one day and this influx of thoughts flood your mind and heart,
it's a little too overwhelming to sort things out even in a few days?

Ever just woke up one day thinking that you want to do something else in life, or suddenly realising that you're not happy or satisfied with whatever you have at the moment?

Well if you have, you're not alone. I'm with you on this one.

It has been really tough for me the past few days; the past week to be honest.
It's one of these days that you just drop to your knees begging for a little more time to figure things out before you head back out there to carry on with your life.
It's just one of those times when you need a little more space than usual, and little more freedom and a little more peace to sort out your life and get things back up and running.

I've been really lost and feeling out of place these few days.
I've had a lot on my mind. In fact, right now there are a million thoughts going on in my head as I type out what I'm feeling at this very moment and my hands are trembling a little.
I'm afraid, really.

It's just as if one day I just got up and everything was out of place.
Maybe I am exaggerating a little bit, but it certainly feels this way.
I was sitting at the table earlier on thinking through my life and about what I wanted.
It was a little too much so I decided I had to take it so down so I could read it the next time I feel this way again.

I feel that I want to belong somewhere else.
This place is already rich and complete with what it is, but it is not enough to fill me.
I feel that everything I had thought was worth it, isn't worth so much anymore.
The people, the ones I felt had more in them, don't really have much in them anymore.
It's disappointing, but I have come to accept that life has helped me understand this.

Sometimes I just want to lie down and forget the world, but that's only for a few minutes because you either sleep thinking about your problems, or you wake up being reminded of them.
Scary how thoughts never go away.
I've been wanting to find myself recently because I feel that I've been out of touch with my own emotions, but in this busy life, who has time for emotions?

Looking for love, wanting to love, everyone's just too busy, right?
How many of you have really sat down thinking, "He's the one I want to spend my life with." or "She's the one I want to grow old with."?
Do people even think like that anymore?
Do people even think anymore for that matter?

It seems like I've tuned myself to believe YOLO - You only live once.
Somehow people have said that YOLO is a stupid excuse to do stupid things in your life.
True there, but doesn't the saying say enough?
You only have one life; but in this one life, you don't get to do all the things you want to do.
Life as it is has its own rules, but should you let it limit you so much that you sit by the sidelines all your life?
Should you let what is depriving you take away all that life has to offer?

I'm at a crossroad.
I don't know what I want to do in my life, but do I know I have to come to a decision soon.
There are so many things I want to explore and study but given the fact that it won't offer as much as other things may, I am not very supported or encouraged to go through with it.
People do different things for a reason; but the world, given the way it is now,
simply forces people to do what they have to, even though they might not like it.

That's not the way I see it. I believe that in this one life God has given you,
it is a test to understand and find yourself, not to do what society tells you to.
You might think otherwise, but this is my side of it.

People want to work to earn millions.
Some do it for the money, some are just motivated.
People spend all their lives working for something that will make them happy when they are old.
But ask yourself, how many times do you get to be who you are now and be happy?
Are you willing to spend all this time to look back at it and feel like you never went for it?

So what if you have the fastest car in the world when you're 60?
So what if you have the most expensive house in the most expensive city in the world after you retire?

When I'm 60, if I'm dying of cancer, but I know that I have lived a happy life, isn't it enough?
Why is society asking so much from the world?
Why are people working so hard to earn what can only buy items that you die without?
Why do people want to work all their lives to earn all that money only to keep them alive with machines later on when their time is near?
Doesn't everything happen for a reason?
Shouldn't people be given the freedom to do what they love or do what they were born for with the time and the life that they have been given?

So many questions that I don't have the answers to.

Teenagers these days say they have the world's most frustrating or complicated problems or that they are dying from insufficient love or from even being alone for a little while.
I say that these kids are choking with the dire want for attention.

Girls want brands, girls want competition.
So what if you're carrying a Long champ bag, so what if you have a Prada wallet?
My Jansport bag is enough to carry the items you have in yours, and my wallet from the departmental store is enough to hold all that I need.
What is there to show to the world?
What are you trying to prove?
Is it really worth all that effort?

Maybe I know why I'm so lost after all.
Maybe this is the time where I realise that I don't want to do what I've always wanted to do, and that is why I'm stuck; I have no other choice but to find something else.
It doesn't feel good not knowing what to do or where to pick yourself up from because you don't know what knocked you down in the first place.

It hurts and it is terrifying to know that you have something bugging you but you don't know what it is or how to rid yourself of that heavy burden in your chest.
Sometimes we all need that little space, and I'm contented I found this one right here.

Just remember that if you do feel lost, take a little time to find yourself again.
I'm just about to do that.